On the phone with my friend in korea and he’s explaining to me in english that he must stop smoking because he doesn’t want to become impotent.
Walking down Gangnam street he says (in english) “I must stop smoking for my dick. My dick is important. If my dick does the broken I cannot sex.”
and I hear in absolute plain english behind him “WHAT”
DRAW ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR ORGANIC CARBON BASED FEMALES OF FRENCH ORIGIN
I am so done with this website omfg.
Never going to miss reblogging this
there are so many super nice people on the internet with basically no audience and there are people who are so rude and mean who get treated like gods
did you mean nash grier?
Joan Crawford in Possessed (1931)
82 years later and it’s still relevant
GET YOUR GAME IN THE HEAD
Mom: That cucumber actor you like seems like a real idiot.
Me: Benedict Cumberbatch?
Mom: Yea, him.
Me: What, mom, no, look…
Wait, no, not that—
Just a minute—
Hold up, give me a minute—
HE’S NORMAL, I SWEAR, JUST LET ME—
Okay, you know what, fuck it.
PLEASE READ. WILL NOT HURT TO AND FORWARD.
Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles
and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the rubbish, but you’ll never make it!!!
If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is
boiling hot as well.
Don’t pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the gutter, etc.
Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little water. A small piece of foil.
Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!! No fingers left and other serious effects to your face, eyes, etc.
Please ensure that everyone that may not have email access are also informed of this.
I’ve dealt with these before. If you find one:
- Do not touch it
- Do not touch it
- Clear the area around it. It will explode on its own in time.
- Once it explodes, do not make contact with the liquid inside. If needed, flush it away with large amounts of water.
- Do not try to detonate it. You’ll probably be disfigured.
I’ve seen what these can do. The acidic liquid inside can strip the paint off a car.
when i visited vancouver these were everywhere. it’s not a fucking joke they’re actually scary
Just a reminder that there are awful shitty people out there doing awful shitty things to everyone else
there was a bunch of these at disneyland
i found one in my back yard, when i let my dogs out, i pulled them back inside, took my cousins bb shotgun and shot it from a safe distance (i was in my house and shot from the screen door. When it went off, my family and neighbors came running to see if everything was ok. I told them what happened and to watch out for them.
These things are not a joke! When we went to check the damage there was a fucking hole in the ground. The dirt in my yard is like CLAY.
This shit is bad news
PLEASE DON’T BE AN ASSHAT. PLEASE DON’T LEAVE BOMBS IN PEOPLE’S YARDS.
WHO COULD BE SO SICK
WHO THE FUCK WOULD PUT THESE IN FUCKING DISNEYLAND WITH ALL THE FUCKING KIDS MOTHERFUCKING ASSHATS THATS WHO
if you ever feel like a failure, just remember that jack crawford and the fbi arrested a vegan as the main suspect on a cannibal case
I’m pretty tired of adults telling me how stupid teens are.
John Green, on whether or not his characters are ‘too intelligent’ (via asschester)
HERCULES IN THE 2ND GIF OMFG
THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY IMPORTANT THOUGH
Hercules is THE DEFINITION of a gentleman. Her dress strap slips down and HE PUTS IT BACK UP because he’s like “No, she’s a lady, she deserves my respect. Control yourself. Leave, just leave.”
Imagine if all guys/girls had that much respect for people they were attracted to…the world would be a lot better and safer, I can tell you that.
Also have to remember he’s never had a girl actually hit on him before.
2nd gif: #zeUS TAKE THE WHEEL #I NEED AN ADULT #WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS
if zeus took the wheel this would have ended much differently
HEY WHATS UP?! WANNA BANG??!!
HOLY FUCK IM TRYING NOT TO CRY LAUGHING IN CLASS FROM THE ACCURACY OF THIS POST
trusting and opening to people is becoming hard. keeping my grades up is becoming hard. feeling pretty and confident is becoming hard. thinking joyful thoughts are becoming hard. doing work is becoming hard. maintaining a friendship is becoming hard. doing everything is becoming hard and i don’t like it.
its really upsetting that this woman has been *probably* harrassed enough to the point that she wants a breast reduction and then when she goes online to express her frustration, she basically gets told she wont be as appealing to men anymore
its absolute bullshit
someone write a superhero story where the lady in the ensemble gets fed up for not getting the respect she deserves so she becomes the villain and manages to beat up all her teammates and rules the world
just because i hate me doesnt mean you can
This was meant to be a quick warm up, but it turned into a comic that I’ve wanted to draw for a while. This is something that is extremely important to me, and I appreciate it if you read it.
A while ago, I heard a story that broke my heart. A family went a cat shelter to adopt. The daughter fell in love with a 3-legged cat. The father straight up said “absolutely not”. Because he was missing a leg. That cat was that close to having a family that loved him, but the missing leg held him back. Why?!
Many people have the initial instinct of “nope” when they see an imperfect animal. I get it, but less-adoptable does NOT mean less loveable. 9 out of 10 people will choose a kitten over an adult cat. And those 10% that would get an adult cat often overlook “different” animals.
All I want people to do is be open to the idea of having a “different” pet in their lives. Choose the pet that you fall in love with, but at least give all of them a fair shot at winning your heart.
Don’t dismiss them, they deserve a loving home just as much as any other cat. They still purr, they still love a warm lap, they still play, they still love you. Trust me, next time you are in the market for a new kitty, just go over to that one cat that’s missing an eye and see what he’s all about!
Let me tell to you a thing.
This is Lenore. I first saw her in a little cage at the Petco I frequent (I used to take my parents’ dog in for puppy play time), and she looked like the grouchiest, old, crotchety cat in the world, and I fell instantly in love. She was cranky, she was anti-social, hanging out at the back of her cage. Her fur was matted because she wouldn’t let the groomers near her.
She was perfect.
But I didn’t have a place for her. I wasn’t living in my own space yet, and where I was, I wasn’t allowed cats. So I pressed my face to the bars of her cage and I promised that if no one had adopted her by the time I’d bought a house, I would come back for her.
I visited her every week for over six months while I looked for a house. At one point, they had to just shave her entire rear-end because the mats or fur were so bad. They told me she clawed the heck outta the groomer that did it, screamed the entire time, and spent the next two days growling at anyone that came near the cage.
A couple of weeks later, I closed on my house. I went back and I got an employee, and I said: “That one. I need that cat.”
They got the paperwork and the lady who ran the rescue that was bringing the cats in told me that Lenore (at the time, Lila) was 8 years old, had been owned by an elderly lady who had died, and brought in to a different rescue, who’d had her for six months on top of the time I’d been seeing her at Petco.
This kitty had been living in a 3x3’ cube for over a YEAR because she was older and “less adoptable.”
I signed the paperwork, put her in a cat carrier, and drove her to my new home. I had pretty much nothing; a bed, an old couch, a couple of bookcases, and a tank of mice I called “Cat TV”. I let her out of the carrier and onto my bed, and I told her “I told you I would come back for you when I had a place. It’s not much, but it’s yours too now.”
Lenore spent the next three days straight purring non-stop. She followed me around the house purring. Sat next to me purring. Slept next to me purring. Leaning into every touch, purring, purring, always purring. She still purrs if you so much as think about petting her. She’s amazing, and I love her.
So, you know, if you’re thinking about adopting, and you see a beast that others consider “less adoptable,” think about Lenore.
IM CRYING I LOVE CATS FUUUUCK
This is beautiful ❤️